Dead calm = The condition of a perfectly flat sea with no waves and no wind.
- Wiki Glossary
- Wiki Glossary
4.26 Dead Calm
Kellie
How is one supposed to be feeling in the morning after a night of burning one's bridges? After a night of turning from a promising young scientist into a jobless fugitive and alleged arsonist and murderer, sought by authorities? There had been no manuals I could read that would have prepared me and told me how I should deal with this. Maybe when it's all over, I'll write my own manual. Step one: Make sure you have a place to hide, before you follow through with your plan, in case you won't be able to return home. Or make sure you have someone with you who does.
I was feeling numb. My sleep had been short and restless. I wished I could blame the hard and unfamiliar bed, not my brain constantly feeding my mind with recent memories.
How is one supposed to be feeling in the morning after a night of burning one's bridges? After a night of turning from a promising young scientist into a jobless fugitive and alleged arsonist and murderer, sought by authorities? There had been no manuals I could read that would have prepared me and told me how I should deal with this. Maybe when it's all over, I'll write my own manual. Step one: Make sure you have a place to hide, before you follow through with your plan, in case you won't be able to return home. Or make sure you have someone with you who does.
I was feeling numb. My sleep had been short and restless. I wished I could blame the hard and unfamiliar bed, not my brain constantly feeding my mind with recent memories.
With a sense of shame I remembered the moments before sleep. I broke down. I cried so much my knees gave under me. Tony held me and craddled me like a little girl.
I thought I was ready for anything and I should have been, when I decided to do something so crazy as going against our government and sabotage their secret project by stealing their top valued test subject from under their noses. Turned out I wasn't ready. Yes, I was pathetically crying into Tony's clean t-shirt he had just put on and I soaked it with my tears. He didn't even blink. The poor man hadn't had a piece of his own comfortable clothing on for months and when he finally did, I used it instead of Kleenex.
"It's going to be alright, Princess," he kept telling me. "We'll find a way to prove your innocence. I'll figure something out, don't worry."
His chest vibrated with his voice under my cheek. It felt almost like a soft purr of a cat. That and the steady beating of his heart reminding me I'm not alone in all this trouble helped me to finally calm down. All the crying had completely drained me. I didn't even have the energy to pull away from him, it was easier to just stay where I was, to resign.
I must have dozed off in his arms, because next thing I remembered was being carried into a bedroom. It didn't even occur to me to wonder whether it was the only bedroom in the whole cabin and where he would sleep, if I took the only bed. Great job, Kellie. How iconsiderate of you to have Tony carry you around and then let him sleep on an old couch after he'd survived the most dangerous type of llama flu and almost had his eye removed.
Before he laid me down on the bed, his breath tickled my face when he said, "I'm sorry to wake you, Princess, but I need your phone now." His soft voice pulled me out of sweet oblivion back to harsh reality.
I handed him my phone in hopes he might have remembered someone who would help us miraculously. Someone who would make this nightmare disappear. Because Chris had always been telling me Tony has contacts everywhere and is insanely resourceful. That's why they couldn't catch him for so long. He was always two steps ahead of everyone.
I handed him my phone in hopes he might have remembered someone who would help us miraculously. Someone who would make this nightmare disappear. Because Chris had always been telling me Tony has contacts everywhere and is insanely resourceful. That's why they couldn't catch him for so long. He was always two steps ahead of everyone.
But instead of making a call, Tony threw my phone on the floor and cushed it just like that. I opened my mouth to protest and shut it again, when I realized he wouldn't do it without a reason. "You think they are going to try to trace us."
"If they haven't tried already, they soon will," he said.
A chill ran down my spine. I felt like an actress in a spy movie. It was scary and... exciting at the same time. Scary because of everything that was happening and exciting, because I wasn't alone in this mess and Tony obviously knew what had to be done.
"Is there anything else we should concern ourselves with?" I asked.
Tony sat beside me on the bed. "We need to get rid of the car."
"Can't we leave it parked somewhere?"
He rubbed his chin. "I'd rather not take any chances. They would tear it apart to find any clue to lead them to us. The car must disappear."
"How are we going to do it? We can't just drown it in a river like they do in the movies. It's not friendly to the environment. I always hate it when they do it."
I stopped talking when Tony gave me a long curious stare. He pursed his lips before saying, "I'll take care of it."
"Promise you won't drown it in a river?"
"I promise."
"We need to compensate Grayson too. It's his car, remember?"
Tony's face told of his genuine amazement. Did he forget the car was Grayson's?
"Compensate?" he repeated slowly, almost as if he was afraid the word might bite him in the tongue. "You want me to pay him?"
"Why yes. We can't just steal and dispose of his vehicle and not give him anything in return. If you don't do it, then I will. When I get a chance to do so, of course."
Tony gave me a long look before speaking slowly, "We stole the car. I assume you understand the general concept of stealing, do you, Princess? It usually doesn't involve any form of payment."
"Yes, I know, but this is my friend Grayson we are talking about. If it wasn't for him, I would have never figured out how to get us out of the lab. He came with the idea of the emergency lockdown."
"I see. We have a debt with him, that's what you're telling me."
"Well, if you put it that way, then yes. We do have a debt with him."
"Then he'll be compensated."
And just like that the matter was resolved. Talking to Tony was really funny sometimes.
"You need to rest now. It was a very evenful night."
This was the moment when I should have asked him, if there was another bed for him to sleep in, but I didn't. I was too focused on myself and my chaotic thoughts.
During the following few hours of restless sleep I thought I heard Tony talking to someone in the other room. "Sì, I'm back in business, Victor," he was saying. "Do you happen to know someone who could use spare parts for a VW?"
It was probably just a dream.
Here I was in the morning, not feeling any better than the last night. Still uprooted, with no plans for the foreseeable future and a dreadful amount of time to spend on my hands.
I looked around the room. The wooden walls were cracked, the paint had flaked off long time ago. All in all the whole house was in disarray, very much like my own life at the moment. It needed to be fixed. But was it even worth the effort? It felt so overwhelming. Maybe I could start with cleaning this room. Tear down the ragged dirty curtains, clean the window, scrub the floor thoroughly. And after I'm done here I can move to the rest of the house. Clean and fix, put everything back in order step by little step.
Work I wasn't afraid of, other things were much scarier. Like the fact that we might get found any moment. Fear of being found and dragged in jail was everpresent in my mind, a silent threat crushing me down, paralyzing me. I was sure I would rather die than take more of the injustice, false accusations and shame. I have always considered myself a decent, law abiding person. But I couldn't just watch, when the system failed Tony and allowed for those experiements on him. It also made me wonder what other horrible things were happening with the government's consent and without us knowing.
I needed to stop thinking or I would drive myself crazy. Time to get up and start the cleaning, Kellie.
I silently opened the door to the other room a crack and peeked through the slit to see if Tony is up. I heard what sounded like a sigh. Tony was leaning against the half-wall with a mug in his hands. He didn't look any more happy than I felt. Add sleeping on that old uncomfortable sofa to that. There was something about him standing there all sad with a pink mug in his hands that made me want to hug him. Sure, go and hug him, you silly. As if things weren't awkward enough after your last night's breakdown.
The floor under my feet creaked and he turned his head to me. His face lit up, when he saw me, but his change of expression made it look as if it was forced. Maybe he didn't want me to see him sad. Later I realized I wasn't wrong, because it had become apparent that, Tony made it his mission to cheer me up and he used every opportunity to do so.
"Good morning, Princess," he said with a broad smile. I had always thought his smile was pretty. Chris looked so much like him after all and I used to have a crush on my brother. But right now the smile only reminded me how rarely Chris had been smiling compared to his dad and how much I missed his smile.
"How are you feeling?" he asked.
I grimaced and sighed, but managed to sum up my feelings with one word, "Adrift."
"I'm sorry," he said and studied me intently for a moment, "are you hungry?"
"I am, but I don't feel like eating at the moment," I nodded towards the mug in his hands, "nice color."
It was his turn to grimace, "there really wasn't much choice in the cupboard, it was either pink or pink with a cat face. I stand by my decision."
I snorted, "of course you do."
"You sure I can't interest you in some breakfast? I flip a mean pancake," he offered with a toothy grin.
It was really difficult to turn his offer down, when he was trying so hard. "Maybe later. I...erm... need to use the bathroom. You don't happen to have a spare tee, I could borrow, do you?"
"Sure I do," he said still grinning. Did he too remember the time years ago when I borrowed his clothes? "Oh and I should probably tell you the water heater is broken. We only have cold water. I will try to fix the thing later today. You can wait if you want."
It was only a minor inconvenience and probably wouldn't be the last one. "I'm sure some cold water won't kill me."
Before I was done washing myself I was freezing and my teeth chattered. Was it normal for the water to be this cold? I rubbed my skin with the scratchy towel to get warm.
The conditions we were finding ourselves in made me realize that until now I had lived a better live than most people. Yes, I was orphaned as a baby. But then I got adopted by a wonderful and loving woman. And even though I lost her all too soon, I still was a part of the Heffner family. I had two siblings I loved dearly. I had lived a life of comfort, not to say luxury. Despite the tragic loss of my adoptive mother I really had no reason to complain.
I stared at myself in the mirror. Look at you, Kellie. All it took was a cold water and a scratchy towel for you to finally realize you're actually a spoiled rich girl. Tony has been right all the time. You are a princess. You never had to worry about being able to pay the bills in time or to afford buying a quality food. You were well taken care of thanks to the Heffner money. This is a life's lesson.
The woman in the mirror stared back at me. She was too girly, too groomed to fit this place. She wouldn't last long. She would break down again soon. She needed to change, to adapt. She needed to quit pitying herself and embrace the things that were her reality now, including the cold water, scratchy towels and uncomfortable bed. I couldn't take the sight of her any longer. I wanted her to look more like how I was feeling. Something had to change about her. Right. Now.
I looked around the bathroom. I started searching the few shelves that were there and the dirty cabinet. No scissors, but I found a cup of an expired shaving cream, a tube of uncapped dried up toothpaste, a brush and a straight razor. I took hold of the razor.
Standing in a bathroom holding an old-fashioned razor inevitably led to involuntary visual association. An image flashed through my mind: my body in the tub full of crimson water with head tilted back and an arm hanging limply over the edge. Well, that's one way how to deal with problems. I shuddered and pushed the image out of my head. But it is not my way.
Maybe I wasn't very brave, but I wouldn't give up so easily either.
I took a strand of hair between my fingers. Last chance to change your mind, Princess.
I started cutting.
When I was done, I pulled on Tony's black t-shirt. I tied a knot at the side to make it look a bit more like a dress. It had to do. Then I opened the door and my senses were immediately attacked by the smell of freshly made pancakes and coffee. My stomach growled in response. Should have known Tony doesn't take no for an answer. He was sitting on the sofa browsing through a brand new looking cellphone. Where did he get it? He put it away when he spotted me.
"What was wrong with your hair?" he asked.
"Nothing."
"Uh-huh," he said and looked down at my legs. He must have noticed my feet were bare, because he blinked rapidly and drew in a sharp breath as if he was about to reproach me for wearing no shoes. Then he must have changed his mind. He cleared his throat and asked me instead, "did you throw your clothes in the trash too?"
"Of course not!"
"Just asking. My supply of spare clothing is limited. Anyhow, breakfast is ready. Let's eat."
This time he didn't ask, he just got up quickly and all I could do was to follow him to the set table.
When I was done, I pulled on Tony's black t-shirt. I tied a knot at the side to make it look a bit more like a dress. It had to do. Then I opened the door and my senses were immediately attacked by the smell of freshly made pancakes and coffee. My stomach growled in response. Should have known Tony doesn't take no for an answer. He was sitting on the sofa browsing through a brand new looking cellphone. Where did he get it? He put it away when he spotted me.
"What was wrong with your hair?" he asked.
"Nothing."
"Uh-huh," he said and looked down at my legs. He must have noticed my feet were bare, because he blinked rapidly and drew in a sharp breath as if he was about to reproach me for wearing no shoes. Then he must have changed his mind. He cleared his throat and asked me instead, "did you throw your clothes in the trash too?"
"Of course not!"
"Just asking. My supply of spare clothing is limited. Anyhow, breakfast is ready. Let's eat."
This time he didn't ask, he just got up quickly and all I could do was to follow him to the set table.
There was a plate of of pancakes, a jar of raspberry jam, fresh pastry and a bowl of cherries on the table. The sight alone was enough to make me salivate.
"Didn't you say there was only expired food in the fridge?" I asked.
"I ran some late night errands."
"The flowers are nice. Where did you get them?"
Tony smoothed an invisible fold on the old ragged tablecloth. "Found them along the way."
"These aren't just some wayside flowers. This is Hydrangea macrophylla. It doesn't thrive in local climate. You can only see it flower in greenhouses and botanical gardens."
He flashed me a smile. "Yeah? That's really interesting. I guess I was lucky then." He sat down and poured himself a cup of coffee. "I'm glad you like them."
To ask him not to steal flowers for me again would hurt his feelings, so I disregarded it. It was kind of sweet of him, I had to admit. However, we had other problems. Agent Stiles is probably turning every stone looking for us right now. And when he finds us...
Some of my thoughts must have reflected on my face and Tony misread my expression.
"What's on your mind, Princess. Talk to me. Do you regret it? Helping me?"
"No, of course not!" I looked him in the eyes, "it's the one thing I do not regret at all." I meant it. Seeing him so alive and brimming with energy helped me fight any doubts I had. "It was the right thing to do." The image of him lying helplesly on the bed in the quarantine lab had been haunting me for days. No, absolutely no regrets. "But what are we going to do now? What can we do to clear our names?"
"Let's focus on you, shall we? It's going to be much easier to clear only your name than both. You could claim I manipulated you, coerced you to help me. It wasn't in your power to stop me from setting the place on fire."
"But that's not the truth!"
"The truth is too crazy for anyone to believe, Princess. We need a believable story and figure out how to keep Stiles away from you. That schifoso will want to silence you for good. I'm sure my friend Vincent will help us with that."
"Vincent? As in Vincent Salvatore? The lawyer who lost your case so spectacularly? Every newspaper wrote about his poor performance. He didn't even call me to the stand to testify in your favour! And you want him to help us? Tell me you're joking."
"Vincent is really good at what he does. You need to give him a chance. As for my trial, I'm afraid he's been paying for my decision. I admit I had my reasons to be okay with any outcome of the trial. There was some information I believed I could obtain in prison. But most importantly I realized I didn't wish for my son to go through all that nasty stuff, I wanted the trial to be over as soon as possible. He was the prosecution's star witness, a cop testifying against his criminal father, you know how much media loved it. Vincent built my defense on discrediting him. I didn't have to talk to Chris to know he's been suffering from depression and Vincent was ready to bring it all into the open and use against him. My son's innocent. I'm not. I've done at least half of what I was accused of. For years I didn't know anything else than killing and sometimes I was enjoying it too much. I deserved to go to jail."
I listened to him and it sounded like he was talking about someone else. About a stranger I've never met. I couldn't imagine him hurting anybody on purpose.
"The longer I kept doing my job the less I cared. People didn't matter to me anymore. They were only a means to an end. More money. Then I met Beryl and she saw something in me. Something I thought I lost long time ago. A splinter of humanity. A glimmer of goodness. I didn't even know I had been looking for it, but she helped me find it again, and I clung to it with all my will. Then they took her from me. If Chris wasn't a living proof of our love, I would believe I had her dreamed up. What a father would I be if I allowed Vincent to paint my son as mentally unstable and troubled person? I instructed him to let my boy be."
Tony leaned forward and gave me what I could only describe as a pleading look. "You can see it too, can't you? What she saw in me." There was an urgency to his voice. No trace of the usual light-heartedness with which he often spoke with me, nor the grim tone he used when he spoke of his past.
"I... It's more that I don't see the opposite, the darkness you're talking about. What you told me... what they say about you, that you're a cold-hearted killer... I can't see it. But I'm biased, because you've always been nice to me. All I've seen is a caring man."
"I've been very careful around you, Princess. I often have very dark thoughts that would scare you. I'm trying to keep them at bay for your and Chris's sake. I try to be a better person every day for Beryl's memory and I fail more often than I care to admit."
"Isn't it what we all are trying to do, Tony? Be better people? Everyone has a dark corner. It doesn't make you less human than me or anyone else. You haven't failed until you stopped trying."
"That's very nice of you to say. Lucky for you to have never seen what I'm capable of. Chris has. Beryl asked me to watch over her kids, but I can't be at three places at the same time. Ironically the best way to protect all of you seems to be staying away from you. I bring only tragedy to people's lives. Look where it's gotten you so far to be around me. My sense is telling me to send you home as soon as possible, but my insticts want me to keep you here by my side where I can protect you better. Then again, you might not need protecting, if you were far away from me. There aren't many things I'm afraid of. But right now I'm terrified I might fail again, I'm terrified because of the danger I pose for you. You said you didn't regret helping me, but maybe you should. You should, Princess."
Was this what he'd been contemplating, when I walked in the kitchen?
"If you know someone you can trust, someone outside the family who helped you in the past, you should consider contacting them. Although Stiles will likely screen everyone you ever talked to. It's either take a risk and stay with a friend of yours or stuck here with me for the time being."
I briefly thought of detective Mitchell. He did help me once. But could I trust a cop right now? I shook my head. "I don't have friends outside work. As a bookworm I've always kept to myself and then I was too busy to have any social life."
"And then you spent too much time visiting an old rogue in the prison," Tony added.
I smiled. "That too. I'll take my chances with you, Tony. If anyone knows anything about hiding and moving in the shadows it's you. If that's what I have to do now, I want the best guide there is."
We continued sipping our coffee in silence. Both of us processing what had been said, until Tony's phone buzzed. He checked it. "Oh, I forgot to mention that we're having a company today."
"A company?" I remembered my 'dream'. "Victor?" I asked.
He raised his eyebrows. "Ah. You heard me speaking to him. Yes, Victor and his boys arrive at dusk. They will take care of our car problem."
"Is it safe? I mean how well do you know those people? Won't they talk? Do you trust them?"
"No. I don't trust anyone who hasn't risked their neck for me at least once. I will pay them handsomely, so they won't talk. Unless someone else pays them more, of course. Which is unlikely. I pay too well."
He suddenly yawned and stretched his neck.
"Did you sleep at all last night, Tony?"
"I slept too much in the past months, Princess. I'm happy to finally have something to do, even if it is mere planning or getting supplies."
"We should check the news regularly," he suggested, "we need to stay updated and watch for anything that could help us."
I nestled down on the sofa, while Tony was turning the old tv on and switching between channels. He found one that was broadcasting news and plopped down next to me. Too close. He rested his arm behind my back. I was still feeling awkward for losing it last night. The memory of his arms around me and steady beating of his heart was too vivid to make my cheeks hot. I shot him a sidelong glance. He looked so relaxed. If he didn't tell me about his struggles and fears, I wouldn't be able to tell he had any.
I was trying to focus on the tv, while being very strongly aware of Tony's arm behind me. Every time I breathed in, my back came into contact with it. It was very unnerving. I considered shifting my position a bit to avoid further contact, but then he would surely notice and give me one of his questioning looks. I started taking only shallow breaths, to minimize expanding of my lungs and raising of my chest, which was quite uncomfortable. Thankfully, I stopped concern myself with all that when things on the screen became more interesting.
Several employees were being interviewed by the newspeople about the circumstances of the fire and one of them happened to be Grayson. I was so happy to see him alive and well. The camera zoomed in on him and one of the firemen, who were overseeing the fire site to make sure the still hot debris won't ignite again.
"...no, I have no idea where the fire started. There was a lot of smoke everywhere. Were it not for captain..." he turned to the fireman "...is it captain or chief?"
"Captain," the other man said and gave him a polite smile.
"...were it not for captain Orellana, who found us and led us out, there would be more casualties, I'm sure..."
Tony snorted, "Your pal Grayson is flirting with the guy in live broadcast. That's rich."
I shot him a glare. "No, he's not. He's just being nice."
"I will bet you anything that he walks away with his phone number in the pocket before the end of the broadcast."
"That's ridiculous. Grayson is quite shy. You're reading much into it."
"Mmm hmm."
Then my name was mentioned by the newswoman. I felt a lump in my throat.
"...definitely not. Miss Heffner is a talented scientist and an upright young lady. She would never willingly team up with such a despicable individual. It is my firm conviction that this Tony Corleonesi took advantage of miss Heffner's trusting and kind nature and by threatening with physical harm to her and her colleagues forced her to assist him. Contrary to other allegations I refuse to believe she was responsible for the fire."
"Why is he doing that?" I jumped agitatedly on my spot (I also used this moment as an excuse to shift my position and move further away from Tony's arm). "Why is he putting all the blame on you?"
Tony watched the tv completely unfazed. "He's helping you, Princess. Looks like your friend figured out the best way to help you too. To paint you as a victim. He knows you have more to lose than me. After all, what difference does one more crime on my list make?"
"It's not right to tell such lies on tv. You didn't force me to do anything. I'm fully responsible for my actions and I'm ready to face the consequences."
"Hush, Princess. I'm telling you, it's a good thing."
How can lying ever be a good thing?
Then the newswoman thanked Grayson and she moved on to interview another person. The camera zoomed in.
I could barely recognize him without hair, with all the burn marks and scars. His face looked as if it partially melted and solidified again. But it was really him. Gabriel. I haven't seen him since the day of his accident.
Next to me Tony made an odd noise. It sounded like a chuckle, but I was sure I must be wrong. Why would he laugh at such
sad sight? I stole a glance at him. He sensed it and turned his serious face to me. He raised his eyebrows curiously. "Anything wrong?"
"No. Nothing."
"...they did this to me!" Gabriel on the screen was pointing at his face and showing his disfigured arms on camera. "Heffner and that...man! I was burning and he was laughing at me. He's a monster!"
"Pardon me," the newswoman said, "Corleonesi was reported to escape the prison yesterday. Your injuries aren't from last night's fire. How could he cause them to you then?"
"I'm telling you it was him and Heffner! You can't even imagine the pain I was in!"
It was all very disturbing. Gabriel's face was contorted with anger. He kept on raging until someone pulled him off camera.
"Ha!" Tony exclaimed. "Stiles and his superiors won't be happy about this. I hope some of the reporters jump at this and investigate. You could come out of hiding if they uncovered the truth about the illegal experiments. You could even testify. But more likely they will think the guy is deranged."
"Poor Gabriel," I said, "he's traumatized by what happened to him."
Tony looked at me incredulously. "The minchione just publicly accused you of attempting to burn him alive and you feel sorry for him?"
I noticed some time ago that Tony tends to use foreign words when he's really worked up about something or speaks of people he particularly dislikes, such as agent Stiles. He also spoke much faster and his accent became more distinct on those ocassions. Just like at this very moment. He gesticulated animatedly as if he thought using his hands could add more weight to his words.
"He didn't suddenly become a better person because of his injuries, Princess. Yes, he looks like a cesso, but he doesn't have to stay like this. Remember all the fancy cars at the parking place? These scientists are paid more than well. I'm sure he can afford a plastic surgery. Who in their right mind would want to wear scars if they don't have to? If they have the means to get rid of them? Unless this guy wants to play a pity game with people or is duro come il muro. Doctors can take the skin from his butt and put it on his face."
"Tony! For Watcher's sake, stop, please! You're being terribly insensitive right now. What horrible things you are saying!"
"What? About the skin from his butt? It's a fact. I read it somewhere."
"You know what I mean!"
"Have you forgotten how this figgh’i buttana treated you, Princess? Do you think he would feel sorry for you if one of the 'accidents' he arranged caused you severe acid burns? It could have been your face looking that way! That pezzo di merda doesn't deserve your pity!"
"Well, you don't have to stoop to his level and revel in his misery, do you? He's still a human being just like you and me and doesn't deserve to suffer. You told me you want to be a better person. What about trying some good old compassion?"
My words finally seemed to have gotten through to Tony, for he stopped flailing his hands and lowered his head. "I beg to differ," he mumbled, "and to make myself clear, I'm nowhere near his level. I would never hurt a woman for turning me down."
He got up. "I better go fix the heater," he said and without another word disappeared in the basement.
Our argument left a bitter taste in my mouth. I knew I was right, so why was I feeling so bad? My eyes settled upon the flowers on the table. You know why, Princess.
Tony emerged from the basement again with a toolbox and a pair of sandals in hand. He dropped the sandals on the floor in front of me. "Here. Put these on. I can't look at you walking around barefooted. Wanna catch a cold and die?"
Before I could respond, he disappeared in the bathroom. I sighed and turned the tv off. I didn't want to fight with Tony. We needed to sort out differences, if we were going to share this small cabin for who knew how long. I put on those sandals and went to the bathroom. I found him working on a dripping tap.
"You already fixed the heater?" I asked.
"No. Can't be fixed. We need a new one."
"Oh. Uhm... listen, Tony, I didn't mean to hurt your feelings back there. I..."
"You didn't hurt my feelings, Princess."
"... offend you?"
"I'm not offended."
"...make you mad?"
"I'm not mad at you." He stopped working and took a deep breath. The tap was still dripping. "Mannaggia! Why can't I fix anything today?" He dropped the wrench on the floor and propped himself on his arms. With his back still turned to me he spoke again. "I'm having this dilemma. Your view of things, the way you see good in all people, it is admirable. I always liked that about you. I don't want to be the one to ask you to change, because I need you to maintain that view - for my sake.
But you need to change. It is not safe for you to be so... idealistic. In our situation, I mean. I know I should expose you to some ugly stuff to prepare you for what we might be up against, but at the same time I want to protect you from it. I'm feeling like I'm clipping your wings by trying to make you see things more realistically. I don't have the right... but you need to be strong, you need to stand with both your feet on the ground. Until you return home to your old life." He finally turned his face to me and casually checked my footwear. "Does it make any sense?"
Isn't it what you want, Princess? To change? It takes more than cutting your hair. "You are right about me having to adapt, Tony. But I don't see how being compassionate is a bad thing."
"It's a weakness in my world. I could prove it to you. We now have to do things my way and deal with a different kind of people than you are used to in order to get what we need for our survival."
"I'm aware of that. I'm probably a burden to you. Without me you could have fled the country and wouldn't have to hide."
"And leave behind the only thing resembling a family I have? No, I couldn't. You're no burden. You're a family. I look after my own."
"Even if they sometimes don't want you to?" I added referring to Chris. I tried to ignore the warm feeling in the pit of my stomach after he called me his family. He totally said it on purpose to make me more open to anything he would suggest! It was working.
He shrugged and gave me a lopsided smile, "That's my specialty."
"Fine," I said, "convince me compassion is a weakness and show me what my other weaknesses are."
"You sure about that?"
"Yes. And who knows? Maybe you'll learn something from me too."
"Maybe."
He didn't sound convinced, though.
* * * * *
For the rest of the morning and half of the afternoon we did our best to make our temporary home more habitable. Tony expressed his irritation about the poor job the person responsible for maintenance of the house did. The house was supposed to look derelict only on the outside. At least they fed the dog regularly and she kept squatters away.
I swept the floors and cleaned the bathroom and kitchen as well as I could, until I ran out of detergent. We started putting together a list of things we would have to obtain as soon as possible. The water heater was at the top of it.
Tony did some minor repairs around the house, he also found some spare lightbulbs in the basement and replaced all broken ones. We needed materials to do more. Our list was getting longer and longer.
Being stuck in one place with nothing to do was the worst. Feeling of hopelessness about the future and fear of being found were never too far. As was Tony and his wit. He always sensed it when I was balancing at the edge of the abyss of despair and came up with something to distract me, whether it was a funny story or him playing on the floor with his dog. She would lick his whole face and he would pretend to fight with her. "No kissing!" he would protest laughing. "Give a kiss to Princess, she looks like she needs one. Go, bollicina, cheer our Princess up."
I swept the floors and cleaned the bathroom and kitchen as well as I could, until I ran out of detergent. We started putting together a list of things we would have to obtain as soon as possible. The water heater was at the top of it.
Tony did some minor repairs around the house, he also found some spare lightbulbs in the basement and replaced all broken ones. We needed materials to do more. Our list was getting longer and longer.
Being stuck in one place with nothing to do was the worst. Feeling of hopelessness about the future and fear of being found were never too far. As was Tony and his wit. He always sensed it when I was balancing at the edge of the abyss of despair and came up with something to distract me, whether it was a funny story or him playing on the floor with his dog. She would lick his whole face and he would pretend to fight with her. "No kissing!" he would protest laughing. "Give a kiss to Princess, she looks like she needs one. Go, bollicina, cheer our Princess up."
I learned two new things about Tony by the evening. He was very particular about his place at the table. I didn't notice it at first. But he would never sit down when I was sitting in 'his' chair until I changed seats. He never asked me to, though. I thought it was just a quirk of his, until I realized that 'his' chair was facing the door. Then it made perfect sense.
The next thing I learned was that he didn't like my pasta. Not one bit. And I have to admit I was a little offended by it.
I know I'm not a super good cook. I never had time to become a really good one, but I always believed I make a decent pasta. I thought I outdid myself that evening, but Tony's face proved me wrong.
At first he was trying to pretend he enjoyed it. The way he picked at his food betrayed him quickly. Seriously, he was acting like a five year old who is forced to eat stewed carrots. He made faces as if every bite was causing him physical harm. Then the questions started. 'How long did you let the water boil before you put the pasta in it?' 'How often did you stir it?' 'You poured oil in the water? Really?' I swear it didn't taste nearly as bad as he made it sound. I enjoyed eating it! Why was the pasta such a big deal? He must have had worse in the jail.
Thankfully, our guests arrived. If Tony asked me one more question about the pasta I would have dumped the rest of it on his head.
Mr. Feng and 'his boys' as Tony called them arrived in a large truck. It had a sign on its sides advertizing that Feng cleaning services will make all your things clean as a whistle before you can blink. We could use it here for sure.
Mr. Feng himself looked nothing like what I would expect a cleaning company owner to look.
He may have been the shortest of the three men, but he spoke the most.
Mr. Feng and 'his boys' as Tony called them arrived in a large truck. It had a sign on its sides advertizing that Feng cleaning services will make all your things clean as a whistle before you can blink. We could use it here for sure.
Mr. Feng himself looked nothing like what I would expect a cleaning company owner to look.
He may have been the shortest of the three men, but he spoke the most.
He jumped out of the truck nimbly and walked up to us. He grabbed Tony's hand in both of his and gave it a long squeeze. "Mister Corleonesi!" he sang, "I was so pleased to receive your call this morning!" He looked him up and down. "Freedom does you good."
"Nice to see you too, Victor. How have things been in the big San Em?"
"Our city misses your services. Noone can do the job as nice and clean as you these days. If you saw the mess we had to deal with last week. Then there's the fish. The fish hunger..."
At this moment he was interrupted by Tony's sharp gesture, which I couldn't actually see, for he was standing with his back to me, but his right shoulder and elbow jerked, and Mr. Feng went silent immediately. But silence obviously wasn't something that dwelled in Mr. Feng's presence too often, for his eyes rested on me and he started speaking again, "I see you already got yourself a pretty lady, mister Corleonesi. We are wasting no time, are we? Errr, where was I? Oh yes, the fish. I meant the fish in San Myshuno public aquarium, of course, miss. We enjoyed watching the staff feeding them, yes, we did. We would stand there and enjoy the silence, didn't we, mister Corleonesi?"
Tony cleared his throat. "Sure."
If anything, I seriously doubted there was any silence involved wherever Mr. Feng happened to find himself. I didn't want to think about other things that were implied during the conversation.
"So, what are we cleaning today?" Mr. Feng asked.
Tony motioned to Grayson's silver VW. "We need the car to disappear. I don't care what you do with it," he shot a look at me over his shoulder, "as long as it doesn't end up in a river."
"Now that would be a waste of spare parts! I can promise you, my boys will clean your car into the most acceptable state of non-existence you can imagine, mister Corleonesi." He turned around and beckoned to his companions. "Wei! Chang! Come here, you slackers!"
The two guys were at his side in a blink. He gave them instructions in Chinese and they got to work right away. They lowered the truck ramp and drove Grayson's car in. I peeked inside the truck as the ramp was slowly rising up again and saw them grab some tools. They started dismantling the car right there and then with lightning speed. Their hands moved so fast and efficiently that I had to admire them despite knowing they probably dismantled stolen cars on daily basis. I was almost disappointed when the ramp hid them from my sight.
I returned to Tony and Mr. Feng who were still deep in conversation.
"I'm considering expanding to Newcrest," Mr. Feng was saying. "There are rumours of future business opportunities. A change is coming to Newcrest."
"Where did you hear that?"
"From a reliable source. No one really controls Newcrest at the moment, as you know. It is about to change. Means more money for all of us."
A chill ran down my spine. I didn't know what it meant, but I could tell it wasn't good news. Tony didn't look too happy about it either.
"Takeover of power in Newcrest? But by whom? My guess would be the Salvatores, if I didn't know they had no interest in Newcrest. Who then?"
"No names were dropped yet. We'll find out eventually. Newcrest is growing. It was bound to happen sooner or later."
I was so absorbed by their conversation that I completely forgot to act like a proper host. "Can I get you a drink, Mr. Feng?" I offered. "I should warn you that our choice of beverages is limited, though. We have tea, coffee and water."
A glass of water will be perfectly fine, thank you," Victor said.
I gathered an assortment of unmatching glasses and poured water from a bottle into them. We didn't dare to drink the tap water here. Not unless it was boiled first at least. I found lemons in the fridge and added slices of one in the glasses. Thank goodness for Tony's morning 'errands'. I brought the drinks outside on an old tarnished tray. I felt a bit embarrassed for the poor state of the dishes and hope our guests would understand it's the best we could offer in our current predicament.
Outside I caught Tony and Victor chatting in Chinese. They stopped talking, when they saw me. Mr. Feng thanked me for the drink and went to check on his boys.
"I didn't know you spoke Chinese, Tony," I said.
"Very poorly. Victor taught me a few words when we were working together."
"That sounded like more than a few words."
He chuckled. "I would be able to ask for directions if I happened to become lost in Beijing. Provided the local people could understand the combination of my Italian accent and the San Myshuno dialect."
"That's a good point," said Victor who joined us again, "even my sister complains whenever I call her, that the cursed San Em has butchered my Chinese beyond salvation, hehe."
One of Victor's employees got out of the truck muttering something in Chinese. If his tone was any tell, I guessed it was a chain of strong curses.
"Chang!" Victor called at him, "did I allow you to take a break?"
The younger man showed him his left hand. It was bleeding from deep cut in its palm.
"Oh. I think I saw some bandages in our medicine cabinet. I can treat his hand," I offered.
"It's just a flesh wound," Victor objected, "get back to work, Chang!"
"Mr. Feng... Victor, please, allow me to help," I urged.
Chang looked at his boss awaiting his final decision.
"Why not let miss Heffner help, Victor?" Tony chimed in, "she likes to help. Men like us should appreciate any help we can get, don't you think?"
"Alright. If you insist, mister Corleonesi. Go with the lady, Chang. She will treat your little scratch, despite the fact that you don't deserve that she touched you even with a two-meter stick. Go! Get out of my sight!"
"Yes, master Feng," the young man said and followed me inside obediently.
I thought Victor was too harsh and my initialy positive opinion on him changed. He should treat his employees better.
Chang washed his hand and dried it. Then I treated his injury with an antiseptic and bandaged it. "See? Good as new," I said and smiled at him encouragingly. He didn't smile back, just eyed me very intently. Maybe he doesn't understand English very well?
"I've been treating my sister's broken knees and elbows all the time," I said and turned round to put the antiseptic back in the cabinet. "I wonder what she's doing right..."
Before I could finish my words I was grabbed from behind and a hand cover my mouth. I froze. The bottle with antiseptic slipped out of my fingers. I heard it hit the floor and shatter. The sound of it breaking etched itself into my memory and I knew it would always bring me back to this moment whenever I hear it.
"Don't make a sound or I'll snap your little neck, Pretty Face," Chang whispered in my ear. He had no idea I was so paralyzed with shock and dread, that I wasn't capable of any sound nor movement. This can't be happening to me...
"Why don't we have a little fun, while the old man and my boss are busy outside. It doesn't happen every day that I meet such a fine girl."
Tony was only a couple of meters away, but he might as well be on another continent, for I wasn't able to call for his help. I was trapped between a bathroom counter and the body of the man behind me. I was on my own and completely helpless. My perception of time slowed. How long have we been here? Five minutes? Ten? Every second Chang's hands were touching me felt like an eternity. How long before Tony notices something is off? Will it be late by then?
Chang pressed his nose to the back of my neck and sniffed. "Mmmm, you smell like the sweetest of desserts and your skin is so smooth. Is it this smooth everywhere?" I felt his bandaged hand on the bare skin of my thigh. I realized there's nothing in its way. If I wore tight pants it could slow him down, detract more precious seconds from the imaginary timer counting down to help's arrival. Tony's t-shirt will be my doom. The bandaged hand moved up my inner thigh reaching the dreaded area and the hem of my panties. A wave of nausea washed over me. I whimpered into the hand covering my mouth and smelling of grease.
"Shhh, no sound, remember?"
I tried to wrench myself from his grasp, but to no avail. He knew how to keep me trapped. He had done this before. My heart threatened to shatter my ribcage, it was beating wildly in my chest like an alarm bell.
Then it was over. Sharp Chinese words cut the silence, reverberated in the bathroom and suddenly I was free. I lost my balance and almost fell on the floor. Tony and Victor stood in the door. A part of me wished that Tony grabbed Chang by the throat and kept punching his face until he bled. I expected questions and dreaded to answer them, but none came.
"Apologize and get back to work, Chang," Victor ordered.
Chang bowed, "Please accept my most sincere apology, miss Heffner," he said and left quickly. No questions, no punishment, nothing. I was shaking. I can't even call the Police, I realized. Tony wrapped his arm around my shoulders. "Come," he said and led me to the living room. Victor followed us. This was all so confusing. They all acted as if nothing serious happened. Is it because they are all men? They didn't even seem surprised to witness the scene in the bathroom.
Then it started dawning on me, but my mind refused to accept the truth. No, he surely wouldn't do this to me... I flopped on the hard sofa and tried to sort out my thoughts. I fought back the tears of humiliation.
"Here. Drink this." Tony handed me a glass. I sniffed at it. A strong smell of alcohol hit my nostrils.
"What is it?"
"Gin."
Where did he keep a bottle of gin? I handed him the glass back. "I don't drink alcohol."
"One glass doesn't make you a drinker. You need it. Drink."
I reluctantly did. I sipped the drink slowly like a hot tea. Tony watched me and so did Victor hovering nearby. The uncomfortable thought in my head couldn't be ignored any longer. "Please, tell me I'm wrong and you didn't stage the incident in the bathroom."
Victor spoke before Tony could, "He meant well, miss Heffner, he just wanted to give you a little scare. To help you..."
"That's enough. Leave us, Victor," Tony said in an unusually low voice.
I felt as if a red haze started clouding my vision. I put the glass away and jumped to my feet. "What the hell is wrong with you, Tony?" He looked somewhat thrown off balance by my sudden fierce response. I started stabbing him in the chest with my finger. "Do you think I'm not scared enough?" Stab "Do you think I haven't been through enough stress in the past weeks?" Stab " My life is upside down and you think it's a good idea to give me 'a little scare'?" Stab stab
"You were never in real danger, Princess."
"It felt pretty real to me! If a stranger was sticking his hands in your... under your..."
He cocked his head a little to one side. "Yes? Go on, please."
If I had ever been close to slapping anyone, it was in that very moment. My hand itched so bad. But the anger, that was my fuel, started fading away, replaced by a feeling of betrayal and humiliation. Being angry was very exhausting.
I collapsed on the sofa again and buried my face in my hands. "I trusted you," I said. "I thought I was safe here with you and your friends."
Tony dropped on his knees in front of me. "That was your first mistake. I never said they were my friends. Even if they were, you should only trust people I tell you to trust. Besides, friends are the worst potential backstabbers."
"For Watcher's sake, how can you live like this? How do you sleep at night?"
"Like a baby. With a gun under my pillow, naturally."
I looked at him. "Aren't you even one bit sorry for what you did, Tony?"
"I am deeply sorry, Princess. I told you all I want to do is protect you. I'm afraid this was part of it. It was the fastest way to teach you an important lesson. Yes, I'm a mean bastard and it was cruel of me, but if you think about it, you got yourself in the situation all by yourself. We threw you a bait and you bit it. We even offered you a way out, but the compassionate nature of yours got you in the trouble. You wanted to help the boy so much that you didn't think of your own safety. He was a stranger and you allowed him to follow you to an empty room. Did they teach you nothing at school? Bad things can happen even in a house full of people."
"Would you do the same to mom?" My question caught him by surprise. He blinked rapidly before answering, "Yes, I would, if it helped her survive. I would have done anything. Even if it meant she'd be hating me for it. Tell me, what exactly happened in the bathroom? What did you do, when he grabbed you? Did you freeze?"
"Yes."
"What if it's Stiles next time? What if they find us and he grabs you when you're trying to run away? Will you freeze again?"
"Probably. I don't know. I wouldn't stand a chance against him. I'm useless."
Tony cupped my head. "You have more courage than half of the men I met in my life. You are stronger than Beryl ever was. You outsmarted Stiles and his people once and you can do it again. Do you know anyone else who could pull such a spectacular breakout like you did? I don't. Give yourself more credit. I believe you can do anything you put your mind into. It's time you started to believe it too. And don't worry, you won't freeze, next time. I'll make sure of it."
I did a lot of thinking that night before I finally fell asleep. One thing Tony said kept popping up in my mind more often than others.
'I often have very dark thoughts that would scare you.'
For the first time ever since I had known him, I actually believe it.
* * * * *
Several days later in Newcrest...
Car Sales Representative: "Mr. Harris?"
Grayson: "Yes. How can I help you?"
Car Sales Representative: "Congratulations, Mr. Harris! You've just become the owner of this brand new Maserati. Fresh from the assembly line!"
Grayson: "This must be some kind of a mistake..."
Car Sales Representative: "My papers say Mr. Grayson Harris, Hillside Highlands, Newcrest."
Grayson: "Yes, that's me, but..."
Car Sales Representative: "Mr. Harris?"
Grayson: "Yes. How can I help you?"
Car Sales Representative: "Congratulations, Mr. Harris! You've just become the owner of this brand new Maserati. Fresh from the assembly line!"
Grayson: "This must be some kind of a mistake..."
Car Sales Representative: "My papers say Mr. Grayson Harris, Hillside Highlands, Newcrest."
Grayson: "Yes, that's me, but..."
Car Sales Representative: "Here's the keys and all necessary papers. Oh, I almost forgot. This sealed envelope comes with it too. Many happy miles, Mr. Harris!" (leaving)
Grayson: "Wait..." (opens the envelope)
Dear Mr. Harris,
our mutual friend insisted that you should be compensated for the loss of your vehicle, which I'm afraid cannot be returned to you. It occurred to me that you could use a better model, one that will add a little shine to your persona. You can rest assured, there are no nasty surprises in the trunk. It will stay that way as long as you stick to your story concerning our mutual friend. Enjoy your 494 horsepower!
Despicable Individual
P.S. Firemen love red too.
Grayson: "Son of a llama..."
Big thanks to Trip and Joanne Bernice for creating two poses I felt I absolutely needed to have in this chapter. Sometimes I refuse to give up my vision no matter how foolish it is. Things must be right!
Other poses I used were made by these amazing creators: A-Lucky-Day, Andromeda-sims, Catsblob, IMHO, Flowerchamber, Moonglitch, Princess Paranoia, Rinvalee, R-Jayden, Sim-plyreality, Something-Wicked-Sims, The Spangleway
No translations this time, guys, sorry. Since most of the Italian words are insults you can either use Google or continue living in blissful ignorance. :o)
Don't forget to stop by the sims forum to discuss this story!
Other poses I used were made by these amazing creators: A-Lucky-Day, Andromeda-sims, Catsblob, IMHO, Flowerchamber, Moonglitch, Princess Paranoia, Rinvalee, R-Jayden, Sim-plyreality, Something-Wicked-Sims, The Spangleway
No translations this time, guys, sorry. Since most of the Italian words are insults you can either use Google or continue living in blissful ignorance. :o)
Don't forget to stop by the sims forum to discuss this story!